


devil in disguise

by phangelica



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Demon Dan - Freeform, Happy Ending, M/M, and he also may fall for him, but bc phil is just so dang wholesome it may be hard, discussions of sinning, he's trying to tempt phil into sinning, honestly its more based off of good omens than anything lol, this isn't based off of any real religion
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-25
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:41:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27193915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phangelica/pseuds/phangelica
Summary: Dan is a demon and is assigned a tough case with the mortal Phil Lester.
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Comments: 6
Kudos: 20





	1. pride.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is completed chapter fic that I'm gonna be updating everyday as an homage to spooky week!! This fic is not really spooky but I thought hey, Dan is a demon so. This fic was written for Dan's bday raffle by phandomwatch for @confused-pumpkin on tumblr :-). Sorry it took so long but hope you enjoy!

Life’s pretty easy when you’re Dan. Dan’s been a demon on Earth since pretty much its inception. He actually came up with the snake to tempt Eve. Since that moment, he’s been coming up with pretty much all of life’s inconveniences. He invented the noise that nails make on a chalkboard. He also came up with phantom traffic, you know, when all cars are at a stand still for no reason? He’s also known to corrupt some of the world’s most evil people. Well, not all of them. Some are too fucked up for Dan to be involved in. Dan believes tempting someone into sin should be for the detriment of them not others. Some demons, and humans, think otherwise.

At this point, in the year 1999, Dan has nothing to prove to anyone. He goes around making life a bit more difficult for the mortals around him and spends most of his time consuming all the culture he can get from them. This is probably his favorite era of Earth so far. He’s been watching every movie that has come out since their invention and reads all the books he can get his hands on. Because of his track record, downstairs pretty much leaves him to his own devices, assigning him a mortal to corrupt every 30 years or so. That usually takes him less than a week to complete but since he doesn’t really get checked on, he pretends the process takes him much longer so the administration doesn’t tell him to do more. 

He thought he had shaken them off for a couple more years after having helped the inventors of the internet when Beelzebub dropped by. 

Dan had been sitting in the living room of his apartment eating cereal while watching _Pinky and the Brain_ , when he suddenly saw a dark figure in the corner of his eye. He felt himself get goosebumps on his mortal body and knew that there was a demon in the room. 

“What do you want, Beezelbub.” he said while shoveling the cereal into his mouth. 

Beezelbub appeared in front of the television. They were absolutely filthy with maggots climbing out of their clothing and crawling around their grey skin. Dan never understood why demons didn’t choose a more cleaned up appearance. Dan always chose to look his best and even though he could technically use his powers for his hygiene and appearance, he liked taking the time to shower and pamper himself, getting ready for each day. 

“The Big Guy has an assignment for you. Philip Lester, 33,” They threw a file down on the coffee table in front of Dan, “He lives in Manchester, England. Works in advertising. Four other demons have tried to tempt him into sin but they’ve all failed. Apparently, the man cannot be tempted. Before He gave up though, He wanted to try with one of his most successful demons, I guess.”

Dan didn’t pay attention to the bitter tone with which Beelzebub said that last sentence as he was already scanning Philip’s file. The previous demons left notes on him saying he was just too positive to be tempted into sin. That it was impossible. Dan scoffed. He’s never met a mortal he couldn’t tempt. 

Dan threw the file back down and picked up his cereal while putting his feet up on the coffee table to pay attention to the cartoon on the TV again. 

“Easy enough.” He assumed Beezelbub would just leave then but they kind of just stood there… glowering. “What?” Dan said through a mouth full of wheaties. 

“What makes you think it’s gonna be so easy?,” Beezelbub growled, “You know, He said that if you failed you’re going to be sent to desk duty downstairs.” They looked down at Dan, defiantly. Dan was doubtful.

“He said that?” It was kind of confusing because He, the Big Guy, had never said anything like that to Dan before. 

“YES! How dare you not believe me!” Beezelbub was engulfed in flames and had grown twice their original size. Dan rolled his eyes. “He thinks you’re getting too close to the mortals. I mean, look at you! You know you don’t have to eat, right?” They smashed Dan’s bowl out of his hands and Dan just sighed in exasperation, “And what is this you’re watching?” They turned around and stood inches from the TV, not understanding.

“What do you mean? It’s _Pinky and the Brain_! I planted the idea in Tom Reugger’s brain myself! The Big Guy gave me a plaque for it!” 

“Ugh, whatever. Just do the assignment. He’s told me to check up on you so expect to see a lot of more of me.” They gave him a menacing smile before a dark fog engulfed them and they disappeared from the living room. 

“UGH.” Dan was already so annoyed. He wasn’t even sure if what they said was true, that the Big Guy is gonna relocate him if he couldn’t tempt Philip. Regardless, he wasn’t nervous. The other demons always apply way too heavy a hand. Dan had that… _human_ touch that always turned mortals. It was more having to actually do his job and talk to people. While he loved human culture, he much preferred consuming it from his apartment and on his own. 

He looked down at the rug underneath his feet that was getting soaked with the milk. That was a real dick move from Beezelbub. The fact that he was going to have to see more of them too was really grinding his gears as well. He’ll just have to get the job done as soon as demonly possible. 


	2. greed.

Dan moves right next door to Phil’s flat the next day. He likes being as close as possible to his targets. There’s not much he technically has to physically do to get his stuff moved in because he usually uses demon magic to get his place all set up so as soon as he finds Phil’s apartment, he knocks on his door, a plate of chocolate chip cookies in his hands.

If Dan was a regular mortal, he would never, ever try to talk to his neighbors as aggressively as he does when he has a target. He tries to keep the cringing internal and not let it affect his body language or face and after millenia on Earth, he thinks he’s gotten close to actually seeming like an extrovert to his targets. He usually stops interacting with them pretty quickly anyway. 

No one answers the door at the first knock. Dan hates himself for it but he knocks on the door again, harder this time. He hears shuffling at the other side of the door and puts on his best “friendly neighbor” smile.

Phil opens the door and the black and white printed picture of him from the file did not do him justice. He stands almost at Dan’s chosen height of 6 feet something and has pitch black hair that is parted in the middle with long strands almost getting in his eyes. Dan wouldn’t be surprised if Phil went to the barber shop with a picture of Leonardo Dicaprio in  _ Titanic _ because it’s almost there. He has wire framed glasses sitting on a nose with a slight bump in it and he’s wearing pajamas.

Dan blanches. He has no idea what time it is. As a demon, he doesn’t need to sleep like humans do. He usually does as he enjoys the dreams he can have and there is not much going on at night but last night he spent the night preparing for his new assignment. The sun came up not that long ago so it must be extremely early. 

“Is everything alright, mate?” Phil looked at Dan with a mixture of drowsiness and alarm, like his body wasn’t sure how awake he needed to be right now.

“Oh! Sorry to wake you! I just moved in next door and I made way too many cookies and I just came by to see if you wanted any!”

Phil looked at him like he had grown an extra head. “What time is it?”

Dan let out a nervous laugh. “Honestly, I have no idea. I spent all of last night unpacking the apartment and I just knew I needed something sweet and by the time they were finished, I looked outside and saw that the sun had come up. I thought I would share them with my neighbor but you can just take them.” Dan held out the plate with the cookies. If Phil didn’t want them, it wasn’t the end of the world and his plan to get himself on Phil’s radar definitely worked. Not exactly how he pictured it but it’ll do.

Phil’s face softened. “Okay. I’ll take them,” He took the cookies out of Dan’s hands and their hands touched as he delicately grabbed it. “I’d love to chat but I did just wake up and I think I need a couple coffees before I can be human.” 

Dan lets out what he hopes sounds like a casual laugh. “It’s alright. I just don’t have anything else to do with them so I thought they should go to a loving home.” 

Phil smiles widely at him. “If a loving home is somewhere where they’ll be inhaled in a matter of seconds, then I think you found it.”

Dan actually manages a genuine laugh for that one. Usually he has to fake a laugh for his targets but something about Phil’s sleepy joke makes him smile. “Alright. I’ll leave you alone now. You can just come over a bit later to get me my dish back. I live right next door.”

“Okay.” Phil barely let Dan get the sentence out before he was slowly closing the door between them. As there was only a sliver of Phil left in the doorway, he let out a small “bye” and closed it. 

Dan is looking forward to getting his plate back.


	3. gluttony

Phil did not come by to give him his plate back.

Although yesterday was definitely a setback, Dan didn’t let it get to him too much. He has to be prepared though. When he comes over, he has to stay so Dan can get some idea of how he is and which way to approach tempting him. When Phil had opened the door Dan was able to get a good look at the bookshelf behind him in the apartment. Or maybe he broke in while Phil was sleeping. However it was, he noticed that his bookshelf was filled with manga. Dan was impressed as he also was enjoying reading manga lately. But also this gave him hope that Phil wasn’t too sweet like the other demons said he was.

And that’s why he has had sushi sitting in his apartment for the past 24 hours. Everytime it starts to get a little smelly from sitting at room temperature he just refreshes it using his demon powers. Honestly, Dan has to get a better word for it. What do you call the demon version of a miracle? No one likes to acknowledge it down there but the fact of the matter is that they were all angels once. And what they do is technically miracles. Only bad. But in this case, good because the sushi won’t go off. But for a bad reason. Whatever. This is what happens when Dan has to sit on his sofa looking casual hoping that Phil just knocks on his door already. 

In the middle of his pondering for a new name for demon miracles, (demiracles? diracles?) there’s a soft knock at his door. He’s at the entrance in an instant and has to remind himself that Phil will definitely find it odd if he opens the door immediately. He counts to five but before he can open the door, the door comes flying open with a gust of sulfuric smelling gas and Dan finds himself on his back. 

“Ow.”

Standing above him is Beelzebub. “You took too long.”

Dan manages to get up quickly enough. He sniffs the jumper he has on and sees that the disgusting gas has infected it and he gags a little. Great.

“What do you want?” Dan needs to now fix his jumper and clean up the living room before Phil drops by and Beelzebub has to be out and he’s gonna be by any minute now!

“How’s it going with the Phil assignment?” Dan groans as he watches Beelzebub sit on the couch, surely getting dirt and other hellish debris on it as they grab a piece of sushi and pop it into their mouth before immediately spitting it out. “Ew.”

Dan just looks at them for a second with his jaw dropped. “Are you joking? It’s barely been a day. And why did you take a piece of sushi if you were giving me shit about eating!”

“Actually, it’s been two days. And I took the sushi because I knew it would bother you, obviously,” Dan rolls his eyes. “Do I need to tell the boss you’re having trouble?”

“What, no! You need to leave. Phil’s gonna be here any minute now, my plan is working fine, okay?”

Beelzebub reluctantly got up from where they were sitting. “Alright. But I wasn’t kidding when I said I was going to check up on you.” With that, Beelzebub dissolves into a puddle of acid on Dan’s rug under his coffee table, burning it slightly. 

“Fuck!” Dan didn’t love to do too many magic tricks in a day because usually, the more miracles you do, the more Hell checks up on you. Actually now that he thinks about it, maybe that’s why Beelzebub came after he spent all day refreshing the sushi. So now he has to deal with this in a mortal way. 

He runs into his bedroom where he pulls out a very similar looking striped sweater to the one he was wearing that Beelzebub ruined except this one is black with white stripes rather than white with black stripes. He goes into his en-suite where he sprays a bit more cologne on himself hoping to mask the scent of sulfur that Beelzebub left behind. He decides to just throw the rug out of his window and replace it tomorrow. He lights a candle on the tv console to get rid of the smell and only uses his demon power to top off the sushi. A couple more times can’t hurt.

As he contemplates the position of the sushi on the table, he hears the knock again. He sighs and is by the door in an instant to open it before Beelzebub can fly through it. 

“What now, Beelzebub!?” As he finishes his sentence and opens the door, he sees a confused looking Phil holding his cookie dish. 

“What?” Oh crap. 

“Oh! Phil! Sorry, I thought it was these neighbor children, they’ve been going door to door trying to sell cookies,” Dan immediately conjures up some children to guilt the building, “I told them I couldn’t but they’ve stopped by multiple times! Have they come to your place yet?”

“What? Kids came to your apartment and you called them satan?” Fuck. Maybe Phil is nice. 

“I’ve had kind of a bad day,” Dan looks down feigning embarrassment, “I was about to eat lunch and I got some take-out sushi but I think I may have ordered too much. Would you like to join me?” Dan tried to smile as innocently as he could. 

“Oh my god! That looks amazing! Could I?” Phil’s excitement was clear. 

“Yes, please!” As Dan closed the door, he smiled to himself. Hopefully he can at least get Phil to overeat and commit gluttony. 

Phil sits on the ground and Dan curses Beelzebub for ruining his rug and having Phil sit on his dirty linoleum floor.

“This is actually the first time I’ve ever had sushi.” Phil grabs a piece of sushi with his hands and pops it in his mouth, moaning as he chews. Dan cringes internally as the chopsticks are right by the plate of sushi but he tries not to judge too hard. 

Dan grabs a cushion off of his couch in order to sit on the ground next to Phil. He grabs a pair of chopsticks and gingerly picks up a roll to dip it in some sauces that he had on the side. Dan looks up to see Phil staring at him. “Did you enjoy it?”

Phil looks away quickly, blushing. “Yeah! I always see these in movies and shows. I would drool looking at the screen but I had never been able to have it myself. Where did you even buy this?”

The truth is Dan used his demonic miracles to conjure them but he can’t really go around telling Phil that, can he. “Just a nearby restaurant. You came just in time!”

“Have you had it before? It’s just you used the chopsticks to eat them and I have never seen anyone use chopsticks outside of anime before.” Phil said with a sheepish chuckle.

Dan will hand it to him. He’s cute as hell. The smile Dan has plastered on his face is involuntary. “Yeah, I have. I actually went to Japan a couple of years ago! You like anime?” Dan had been to Japan, just much more recently than a couple of years ago. He was actually there a couple of weeks ago when his last assignment ended. He was able to go under the radar and avoid the scrutiny and attention that would definitely cause him finishing an assignment so quickly. He doesn’t really meet a lot of people in Manchester who likes anime like him.

“Um, try love it! I’m so obsessed!” Phil was staring at Dan with a goofy grin. Dan saw he wasn’t taking another roll, so he tried to tempt him to take another but Phil seemed almost impervious. 

“Yes! Me too, actually!” It was always a good assignment when Dan didn’t have to completely reinvent his personality. “What’s your favorite show?” Dan looked nervously at Phil sitting cross legged on his floor. “Do you want more sushi?” Dan had already eaten like half the platter. 

“It’s okay! You seem hungry. Don’t let me steal your food.” 

Dan was slightly taken aback. Not only was Phil seemingly immune to his demonic powers of temptation but he also seemed immune to simple peer pressure. “No it’s okay! Eat more!”

Phil looked slightly wary now. “It’s fine… To be honest, I ate before I got here.”

“Oh. Well if you have something else to do, I don’t want to keep you.” Dan was trying to play it cool but in reality this went completely against how he thought. Maybe this will be more difficult than he previously thought. 

Phil let out a loud laugh. “Ha! No, I’m good I wasn’t doing anything anyways. I didn’t know there were people my age in the building.” 

Dan had done a scan of Phil’s building before he moved in. It was mainly older couples and families. There really wasn’t anyone around Phil’s age. But also to be fair Dan was actually much older than a lot of the residents here in the building. “Couldn’t convince any of the kids to watch  _ Sailor Moon  _ with you?”

Phil blushed and looked down. “No! I think all the neighbors think I’m weird. Would you ever want to watch some  _ Sailor Moon _ with me?” Phil seemed shy as he said it but Dan couldn’t help the sly grin that stretched across his face.

“I would love to.”


	4. Chapter 4

The next day, Dan tried to keep his distance from Phil. He didn’t want to seem too eager as he could see that sometimes his pushier ways only served to push Phil away from him. He was brainstorming what could be his next line of attack when he heard a soft knock on his door.

He is shocked to see Phil standing there in a pair of pajamas and holding up a battered VHS tape.

“Oh my god, Dan. Guess what!”

Phil stared at him expectantly for a couple of seconds… Did he actually want him to guess? Well considering he’s holding up a VHS of _Ghost in a Shell_ there really couldn’t be too many guesses. “Um, you came over to watch anime with me?”

Phil let out an adorable giggle with his tongue sticking out. “Yes! I went to Blockbuster and I finally found it! I’ve been looking all over the place trying to find it and it’s finally here in my hands.” Phil gets a moony expression in his eyes and actually kisses the VHS in his hands. Guess he gets less shy as the days go by. 

“That’s great Phil! I haven’t seen it either!” A lie. “Do you wanna come in and watch it in here?” 

Phil smiles widely. “Duh! That’s why I came over!” 

Phil stomps in and seems a bit confused when he sees the big black rug underneath Dan’s coffee table that wasn’t there before. Dan had fixed that soon after Phil had left yesterday. Phil didn’t stay long after they agreed to watch anime together. 

Dan grabs the copy of _Ghost in a Shell_ and walks over to the TV where he sticks it in the VHS player and the TV comes to life with the credits. In a panic, Dan screeches and closes his eyes and covers his ears trying to avoid anything close to a spoiler. Although he has seen this movie, he still didn’t want to be reminded of the end right away.

He hears Phil’s muffled giggles off to his side. He cracks an eye open to see Phil heading to the VHS to go rewind it. “I absolutely hate spoilers.”

“Well, don’t worry. I got you.” Dan felt his human body warm and he cracked his eye open again to see Phil looking at him fondly before quickly looking away. Dan tries to convince himself it wasn’t there. He gets up quickly and goes into his room where he grabs his monochromatic quilt and does a bit of magic to bring lights around the lounge. Perhaps this can be an opportunity to tempt Phil into committing the sin of sloth. 

When he gets back in the lounge, Phil widens his smile. Dan turns off the lights in the lounge leaving only the fairy lights and the TV now paused on the first frame of the movie lighting them up. “Thought I would bring out some mood lighting.” Dan feels himself blush again as he settles the blanket over the two of them. He doesn’t know what’s wrong with him. Phil is obviously very attractive but that always got away from him when he let himself give into that. Plus, he would rather tempt mortals into more interesting sins than lust anyway.

Dan and Phil watch the film in complete silence. Dan has forgotten how good this movie was. As he breathlessly awaited the climax of the film he had almost forgotten that there was an assignment on the line. As the credits roll again, he knows he can’t let the afternoon end here.

“Do you have anywhere to be, Phil?” 

Phil gave him a shy smile. “Nope.” 

Dan went back into his room. He conjures up three more tapes: _Whisper of the Heart_ and _Sailor Moon S: The Movie_. “Look what I have here! I got these from the store yesterday!” 

Phil gapes his mouth open at him. “What! How? I’ve been to every Blockbuster in this area looking for those and they never have them! When did you get these?” 

Whoops. Dan looks down at the tapes. They’re a bit pristine. “Like a couple days ago or something. Do you want to watch or not!” 

“Are you kidding? Yes!” 

Dan smiles widely at him and sets up _Whisper of the Heart_. They watch the movie in silence again. Dan has actually not seen this one! It seems Phil is eager to watch too.

Without even saying a word, as Whisper of the Heart ends, Dan gets up and puts Sailor Moon in. 

“I’ve actually seen this one.” Dan snuggles up underneath the blankets again, hoping Phil won’t mind him talking a bit. 

Phil snuggles underneath the blanket. Dan feels him press his knee against his thigh. He looks over at him conspiratorially and whispers, “Me too.”

They start out the movie quietly but sooner rather than later, they start whispering to each other. Dan knows there’s no real reason to whisper but it seems fitting. 

Phil starts talking about his life. About how he grew up near Manchester and he went to the University of York. He studied English Language and Linguistics. He wanted to study film production afterwards but his dad convinced him to take a job at a publishing company in the city where he can use his degree. 

Dan listens with wide eyes. He loves learning about humans and their lives. Hearing Phil’s normal life makes him mourn the one he never got to have. What he would give to be fully mortal, he will never know.

“Dan?” Phil rouses him out of his thoughts. The movie still goes on in the background. Phil’s lit up by the colors on the television with the reflections in his glasses. Dan can just make out the blues in his eyes. 

Dan licks his lips trying to wet his suddenly dry mouth. “Yeah?”

Phil looks down at his mouth and smiles. “I asked about you. Where are you from?”

Dan feels the blood leave his face. He had gotten so cozy with Phil he had forgotten that there was a reason he usually didn’t. “Oh, well you know. I’m from everywhere.” 

“What do you mean?”

“I moved around a lot.”

“Oh.” Dan could sense that his response disappointed him. He looks over at the telly and sees the credits rolling. Phil follows his gaze to see that the movie has ended. 

“Guess I should probably get out of your hair then. I’ll see you around?” Phil suddenly seems sheepish and unsure. 

Dan curses himself. He has to reassure him. For the assignment. “Yes, Phil. Definitely.”


	5. envy.

Dan could barely fall asleep that night. Eventually, he had to stop trying and decided to start thinking of new ways to tempt Phil. Because that was the whole point! He couldn’t forget the goal here.

But it was hard because thinking about ways to tempt Phil just led to more thoughts of Phil. Phil’s eyes underneath his glasses as they watched  _ Sailor Moon _ . His arms when he would stretch and put his arm along the back of the sofa. His lips as he spoke quietly in the low light of the living room…

But no! Dan couldn’t think like that. He wasn’t even sure where this was coming from. He had obviously taken advantage of his human body from time and engaged in a bit of…. lustful behavior. But that had always just been a physical thing. He had never cared about the actual soul underneath further than his own body’s needs or to the extent that it corrupted it. This with Phil… it felt different. Something about Phil felt like it was a magnet to bring Dan closer to him and he didn’t get it.

He was shocked when he looked out his window and saw that the sun was coming up. He had stayed up all night trying to come up with new plans to tempt Phil and he hadn’t come up with anything. If anything, Dan was scared to interact with Phil at all now that he was having these thoughts. Even though he was a demon, he felt hesitant to hurt Phil. 

At least the sunrise was beautiful. Many times in Dan’s existence he has spent hours just watching the sky, seeing the clouds move and the sky change colors. He thought about heaven and how things were going up there and thought about the beginning of time and his time as an angel. 

Before he knew it, it was afternoon. He was relieved he was able to get his mind off of Phil but as soon as the thought crossed his mind, as if he had manifested it, Phil was walking out of their building and into the parking lot. It’s as if he was being punished for something. Phil walked out wearing a pair of black jeans with a colorful striped tee shirt on top. His hair was perfectly parted down the middle and he seemed to be walking with purpose in a pair of patent leather doc martens. 

Dan had never seen him so dressed up.  _ Where could he be going?  _ This seemed like the best time to get some recon done. Dan quickly changed from his sweats to a pair of black jeans and black loafers and went out into the parking lot. He went into his bentley that he has had for decades now but he continually updated as the years went and new models came out. This one was a 1999 Bentley Arnage and he quickly found himself at a coffee shop where Phil appeared to be waiting for someone. 

Dan miracled a disguise for himself as he sat in the corner and magnified his hearing so that whenever whoever Phil was waiting for walked in he would be able to listen in to their conversation. 

Dan’s not sure what he expected but he was shocked when another man walked in. He had light brown hair that laid on his forehead in waves. He was wearing a worn looking band shirt and a pair of dark acid washed jeans. Dan noticed he was a bit shorter than Phil when Phil got up to hug him as he walked in. Phil’s whole demeanor lit up as he saw him. 

Dan’s chest hurts. He’s not sure what exactly it means but he’s stressed. He shouldn’t care but the thought that this guy could mean something to Phil… 

This is exactly why he needs to put some distance between himself and Phil. Not like he can  _ actually _ put distance between them as he was his assignment but he needed to put some emotional distance between them. 

It’s with that thought that Dan starts paying attention to their conversation. While Dan might have wished it wasn’t so, it becomes clear to him that Phil is on a date right now. They keep giggling at each other as they talk. Phil’s companion is called Jimmy and he went to uni with Phil. Apparently, Jimmy has been living in London for the past couple of years and this is the first time they’ve seen each other in a while.

Dan hates Jimmy. He hates the way he looks at Phil as he sips his coffee. He hates the way his feet reach out under the table to lightly kick Phil’s. He hates the way he laughs loudly when Phil tells even the most mediocre of jokes and he hates how Phil beams at that. 

Dan knows he’s failing at the whole “emotional distance” thing. He doesn’t understand why he’s feeling so much. Is this jealousy? He’s debating with himself if he should just leave or stay in case something actually relevant to the case comes up when Phil asks Jimmy if he wants to see his apartment. 

Dan immediately gets up, knocking over his mug in the process. It shatters and coffee gets all over the ground. The whole cafe is looking at him and he can feel himself blushing as Jimmy and Phil get up.   


Jimmy starts picking up pieces of mug as Phil stands a bit behind him looking shy. “Do you need a bit of help, mate?”

_ Fuck you. _ Luckily, his disguise allows himself to be unrecognized by Phil’s curious gaze as he pushes past both of them to his Bentley.

*

Dan speeds through the streets of Manchester ignoring the honks and yells from pedestrians. He has to get back to the apartment as fast as he can.  _ What is going on?  _ Dan has never experienced such a rush of emotions. He feels like he could cry but also destroy something. He hates it. He hates these feelings and he hates Phil.

…

But he doesn’t hate Phil. That’s the problem, isn’t it?

As soon as he gets in, he runs into his bedroom and plants himself face down on his bed. He recognizes he’s acting like a teenager but he has to let himself have this. The other option would be to punch the wall and that would just be inconvenient. 

He makes his CD player start playing music at full volume while still faced down on his pillows and starts playing the most angsty album he possibly can while wallowing in his idiocy,  _ Jagged Little Pill _ .

As Alanis Morrisette’s voice fills his apartment, he groans into the pillows. Did he really think that Phil cared about him at all? He just needed a friend and Dan was the most convenient person. 

“FUCK!” Dan punches his bed. That was the whole point wasn’t it? He’s supposed to be influencing Phil not falling for him. This has gotten way out of hand. Perhaps next time Beelzebub stops by he’ll tell them he’s not feeling up to it anymore. Maybe a couple centuries in Hell would be good for him. 

The thought depresses him even more.

He swears that even though the music is pounding and realistically he can’t really hear Jimmy and Phil, he sees the whole thing going down as he stares at nothing. 

He’s unsure how long he’s been lying there looking at his ceiling with the album on replay when he hears a soft knock on his door. 

Dan gets up hesitantly. Although he has formulated a plan for Beelzebub, he doesn’t feel ready just yet. He waits to see if Beelzebub will let themself in. 

What happens is another soft knock. Curiously, he heads over and looks through the peephole and although it could have quite literally been nobody else, he’s still surprised when he sees Phil’s happy face.

_ What the fuck? _ Did Phil come over freshly shagged? Dan doesn’t know if he could take it if he did.

Dan opens the door slightly only allowing Phil a small portion of him as he regards him. 

“What do you want, Phil?” He asks, resigned. Even at the thought that Phil went out with another guy and that Dan is way too invested in Phil to tempt him effectively. Just seeing him in the flesh makes him realize he’s not going to leave him now. 

Immediately, Phil’s smile slips off his face. “Dan? What’s wrong?” 

Dan feels himself sigh involuntarily. Usually he can put up such a good façade for his other targets but it’s impossible with Phil.

“Nothing,” he says shortly, “Did you need something?”

Phil looks hesitant and almost hurt. It pains Dan to know he put that face there but he knows that’s exactly the reason he has to be like this. 

Phil’s face hardens as if he’s gathering up courage and says, “I just came by because I heard your music. I love Alanis Morisette,” at that Phil lets a small smile stretch across his face. “But do you know what my favorite way to listen to music is?”

Dan tries to resist the smile that he can feel popping his dimples and looks down so that maybe Phil can’t see it. Why does Phil have to be so cute? He looks up with a resigned sigh and smirk. “I don’t know. What is it?”

“In the car.”

*

If someone were to ask Dan later if he tried to resist Phil at that moment, he would say of course he did. But of course, there’s always the assignment to think about. And that’s how he’s ended up in Phil’s Suzuki. 

It’s a complete mess, of course. There’s old takeaway bags and receipts littering the floor. In every cup holder the car had there was a half empty bottle of water. As they went inside, Phil started blushing furiously, apologizing profusely as he attempted to “clean up.” Meaning throwing all the trash into the back seat. Dan’s cheeks hurt from fighting smiles.

Once Phil has determined the car is clean enough for their excursion, he pulls down the sunvisor to a collection of CDs. 

“What are you feeling like Danny Boy?”

The fact that Dan manages to not laugh is a miracle. “What?”

Although he did get into the car, he still feels resentful. Why is Phil doing this after going on a date with another guy? For the first time in his existence, he finds it impossible not to wear his emotions on his sleeve.

Phil sends him a confused glance from the driver’s seat. Dan can see his hands trembling as they reach for the CDs. “I have Oasis, Red Hot Chili Peppers…” He trails off and looks over where Dan sits biting his lip slightly, “You can look if you want.”

Dan sighs. Has he always sighed this much? “Put whatever you want, Phil.”

Dan turned away from him and looked out the window. He recognizes Phil is probably really confused because according to him, he has no idea what he was up to today. It’s unfair to take it out on him like this. But on the other hand, Dan shouldn't even care about how Phil feels. This is just about the assignment. Why can’t he stay focused on the assignment?

As he looks out into the parking lot, the car starts and he hears the opening guitar strings of “Hello” off of  _ (What’s the Story) Morning Glory?  _ As they pull out of the parking lot, he sees Phil in his peripheral vision looking over at him with a furrow in his brow. 

“Are you sure everything’s alright?” 

Dan resisted rolling his eyes. “I’m fine, Phil.”

“It’s okay if you’re not! I didn’t want to force you out if you’re truly in a bad mood. Well, I thought maybe if you were in a bad mood, I could maybe lift your spirits a little. Maybe you’re not even in a bad mood! Well, I mean who listens to  _ Jagged Little Pill  _ like three times in a row without being a little upset, right?”

Phil’s rambling and Dan can’t help but find it very cute. “Phil, it’s okay. I was in a bad mood but honestly I’m already feeling better,” He finally turns his head to look at Phil and regrets it as the setting sun streams through the window encapsulating Phil in a golden halo. Wow. 

He really is a ball of sunshine, huh. 

Even though he’s pretty sure Phil is probably an angel (in a metaphorical way, of course), he’s given up on trying to fight it. He lets the smile through that’s been trying to stretch his face since Phil came to get him. 

Phil looks over smiling and gets on the motorway. At that, Dan raises the volume on the radio and starts screaming Oasis at the top of his lungs. Phil just giggles besides him and sings alone too.

When “Wonderwall” starts Dan even sticks his head out of the window to sing. Phil yells at him to stop and Dan can’t stop laughing looking at Phil’s panicked face. 

Phil was right. This is the best way to listen to music. 


End file.
